Overcoming Fear 2: Interview with Chris Painter.

Q1: You keep a really upbeat energy about you, despite having been through a fair bit of stress, what’s your secret?

A: I guess my secret to stress relief and staying calm in the face of adversity is to focus on as much good as I can in my life, relying on my friends and family and physically removing myself from as much of the stressful stuff as I can. Work can be a real stress for me because of many things, not least of which is my sexuality. The way I deal with this is by keeping friends close and removing myself from the village during my free time and filling my life with as many positive thoughts and memories made as I can. In this way the stress seems to dissipate and I can face the issues as they arise at work or elsewhere by tackling them when and where I can. I think it is also important to be realistic about what you can and can't do. My father for instance is very unwell and has been for some time and I fear for his health and how long he will be around. This is a constant stress on my life but I know I can do nothing to improve his health but I can be there for him and talk on the phone and fill whatever time we have with as much good stuff as possible, focusing on the progress he makes, however small. I don't believe we are designed as humans to live in isolation, we are designed for community; to help one another and this I guess is my secret, to let other people whom I trust into my life to help me when I am down.

Q2: How has your faith helped you stay strong?

A: My faith has kept me strong but I feel the 'church' has really damaged me if I am honest. Many times when I try to talk to church people about my stress they quote verses at me about not being troubled and Gods got it covered etc which really doesn't help, I want you to love me and support me, not to proselytise at me you know. My faith however remains strong and it is comforting to pray and meet with my Christian family. I know that God has it covered and I know that in the end it will be ok and I know that God truly does care for me, I just guess sometimes it's easy to get caught up in the fear. Without my faith I know I wouldn't be coping at all right now and I am thankful to God for every piece of progress and every day that passes and really take joy in successes, be that at work or elsewhere.

Q3: As a youth worker how do you go about helping young people struggling with anxiety?

A: As a youth worker I feel it is so important to be real with young people and to be honest and as open as possible with them about the struggles in your own life. It is so easy for young people to put youth workers on a perfect pedestal and forget that we are human too and have real struggles in our own lives. I do whatever I can on a one to one basis to help give perspective to problems and help young people create action plans over how to overcome their stress, be it exam related, partner problems or whatever else, there is always a way forward and sometimes it's about finding the next step and not worrying about the end goal but getting up and making the first step.